Why We Neglect Ourselves During Stressful Times — And How to Break the Cycle

Estimated: 3 min read

Sep 19, 2025

Why We Neglect Ourselves During Stressful Times

Stress puts the body into “survival mode,” making self-care feel less urgent.
High stress depletes mental energy, leading to poor food choices, skipped workouts, and lack of sleep.
Neglecting self-care increases stress in the long run.
Small, intentional actions — like a walk, a healthy meal, or breathing exercises — restore resilience.
Self-care isn’t indulgence during stress; it’s essential for coping and recovery.

When life feels overwhelming, many of us do something counterintuitive: we stop taking care of ourselves. Exercise routines get dropped, healthy meals are replaced with quick fixes, and sleep suffers. It’s almost as if self-care becomes optional when we need it most.

But why does this happen? And what can you do to stop neglecting yourself when stress levels rise?

The Science Behind Stress and Self-Neglect

When you’re under pressure, your body activates the stress response system. Cortisol and adrenaline flood your system, priming you to survive immediate challenges.

The problem is, this “survival mode” hijacks your priorities. Activities that support long-term wellbeing — eating well, resting, moving your body — feel less urgent than tackling the next task or putting out the next fire.

On top of that, stress increases cognitive load and decision fatigue. Your brain has less capacity for planning and self-regulation, which makes it easier to skip the workout, order fast food, or stay up late scrolling.

Common Ways People Neglect Themselves Under Stress

Research shows that during stressful times, people are more likely to:

Eat poorly — reaching for comfort foods high in sugar or processed ingredients.
Exercise less — citing fatigue or lack of time.
Sleep poorly — with stress disrupting circadian rhythms and increasing rumination.
Turn to maladaptive coping — such as alcohol, smoking, or endless screen time.

Ironically, these behaviors amplify stress over time rather than relieve it.

Why Self-Care Feels Optional (But Isn’t)

It’s natural to think of self-care as indulgent or secondary when life is chaotic. But here’s the paradox: stress makes self-care harder to prioritize, yet more essential to practice.

Small acts of self-care — a nutritious meal, a 10-minute walk, a breathing exercise — aren’t luxuries. They’re the very tools that regulate stress hormones, restore mental clarity, and build resilience.

In other words, self-care during stressful times isn’t about pampering yourself. It’s about maintaining your capacity to cope.

How to Care for Yourself When Life Is Overwhelming

The good news? You don’t need to overhaul your life to start breaking the cycle. Even tiny, intentional actions can create a shift.

Here are three practical strategies:

Start small. Pick one non-negotiable act of self-care each day — a walk around the block, a proper lunch, or switching off your phone before bed.
Reframe self-care as resilience. Instead of seeing it as optional, remind yourself that caring for your body and mind equips you to handle stress more effectively.
Notice your patterns. The moment you catch yourself skipping meals, sacrificing sleep, or numbing out, pause and ask: what’s one small thing I can do to care for myself right now?

Final Thoughts

Stress has a way of convincing us that there’s no time for ourselves. But the truth is, neglecting your wellbeing only compounds the pressure. By leaning into even the smallest acts of self-care, you move from survival mode into resilience.

The next time life feels overwhelming, don’t ask what you need to do for others. Ask what you need to do for yourself. That’s not indulgence — it’s strength.